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June 29 某zt爆笑语录几则~~--复习算法郁闷之极偶成此文, 谨献给经常让俺爆笑且其人生终极目标是活抓一个外星人的可爱猪头, :)
1. 某日, 在BBS上看到前微软CTO现Intellectual Ventures创始人Nathan Myhrvold的传奇一生的描述, 遂生天才少年果然一生无敌的感叹, 将此文转给某只即将面临失业的猪头后, 半晌无反应后只发给我一句话:
我决定积极地面对人生,做个NB的人!
偶当时笑翻, 欲将此句作为新的签名档被某猪暴K, 遂作罢. 2. 今年过年回家常与猪头短信往来, 某日在家收到其短信, 内写: 你在干嘛? 猪头张XX(猪头的大名) 看后大乐, 心想此人总算有了自知之明, 明白自己是猪头了. 后来发现是该猪设置了个短信署名功能, 以后每封短信后接其大名且无空格, 本想叫我猪头, 结果自己反倒被害, 该短信被偶永久保存且时不时拿出来嘲笑之, 哈哈
3. 某日晚饭, 跟猪头感叹现在水木pielove版的奇迹男女, 征友要求有车有房月薪过万北京户口, 更有奇迹者要求GPA>90,有学生会副主席以上经历者, 不禁orz万分. 某猪被偶"嘲笑"一条都不符, 沉默半晌后缓缓说道, 俺以后买个房车不就满足有房有车了么, 而且房车结合了住房和车子的优点, 想住哪儿就住哪儿, 二环住不爽了咱就直奔三环, 小区住腻了咱就住公园, 偶orz to death, -______-bb
4. 某日又是晚饭, 猪头看到C楼前一白色车辆指着问我, 知道这是啥牌子车么? 俺是车盲故摇头之. 猪头得意地告诉我说, 这车叫宝驴. 偶立扑, 问之何为宝驴. 猪头答曰, 该车车头极像宝马, 但整体性能差之千里, 具体体现在跑起来不像马倒是像驴, 故俺特赐名为宝驴. 语毕, 偶暴寒, -_-bb
5. 嗯, 这个是猪头童年的奇迹爆笑经历加语录. 某猪刚上小学那会儿身子瘦瘦小小头却奇大, 经常受人欺负. 某日放学回家路上被几个高年级小学生盯上欺负了一顿, 最凄惨的是裤子还被扒光了, >_< 说到这里猪头表情凝重, 正当偶心疼其悲惨遭遇想说点安慰的话语时, 猪头突然面露ws笑容对俺说, 其实当时偶还挺开心地享受回家那段路程的, 因为那时刚刚告别开裆裤觉得新裤子透气性不好, 扒光了正好透透气..... 偶无语问苍天.....
附录:
关于Nathan Myhrvold的BH人生引自下文, 出处暂不可考:
Nathan Myhrvold, formerly Chief Technology Officer at Microsoft, is co-founder of Intellectual Ventures, which is seeking to build a large invention portfolio. He personally holds more than 18 U.S. patents and has applied for more than 100.
Myhrvold attended Mirman School. He began college at age 14.He studied mathematics, geophysics, and space physics at UCLA (BSc, Masters). At Princeton he earned a master's degree in mathematical economics and completed a PhD in theoretical and mathematical physics by age 23. He also attended Santa Monica College. For one year, he held a postdoctoral fellowship at Cambridge working under Stephen Hawking, studying cosmology, quantum field theory in curved space time and quantum theories of gravitation, but left to join a computer startup in Oakland, California. The company, Dynamical Systems Inc., sought to produce a clone of IBM's TopView graphical user interface. Microsoft purchased Dynamical Systems in 1986 and Myhrvold worked there for 13 years. Myhrvold is a prize-winning nature and wildlife photographer. He is also involved with paleontological research on expeditions with the Museum of the Rockies. His work has appeared in scientific journals including Science, Nature, Paleobiology and the Physical Review, as well as Fortune, Time, National Geographic Traveler and Slate. He has contributed $1 million to the SETI Foundation for the development of the Allen Telescope Array, planned to be the world's most powerful telescope.
In addition to his business and scientific interests, he is a master French chef who has finished first and second in the world championship of barbecue in Memphis, Tennessee. He also works as an assistant chef at one of Seattle's leading French restaurants.
批注: 此君只应天上有, 只此下凡走一遭 June 23 随笔我的博客好像一直以来访问量都不高, 记录的也只是一些断断续续的东西, 看起来好像俺只是一个啥都不关注, 不能够于生活细微处发现闪光亮的mm, 更不用说什么文采风流, 伤春悲秋了.
下面是做blog性别测试的结果, 看得我真是吐血啊:
男子汉的阳刚形象? 我立扑....
好吧, 我承认, 我写博客往往是打开一个窗口写了点东东, 立马发现有事情还没做, 或是新的事情又来了, 只好啪一下关掉窗口, 心想下次再写了, 这也导致每次只能留个只言片语, :(
其实, 我还是蛮女性化的, hiahia. 比如, 盯着可爱玩偶会有冲动全买回家, 可以拉着sm逛上十个小时街血拼一堆东西累得他吐血, 喜欢精致的小饰品, 喜欢做一桌子菜让一堆人品尝, 这些难道还不女性化?
其实, 我还是蛮想写一堆东西的, 每天生活中的点滴, 零星琐事的感悟, 有好多好多, 还来不及记下来, 就随着我的瞎忙活, 穷折腾而淡忘了...
以后尽力做到吧, 再忙, 也需要有时间整理自己的思绪, 沉淀对生活的感悟, 不是么?
立此为证, 不能每次看自己的博客都觉得这是一个没有文笔且懒散的家伙的小窝, 嗯 June 19 卷土重来又是好久没写日志了, :(
终于在今天打开今年的结果时长长舒了一口气, 激动ing...
天道酬勤, 我真的相信这句话.
抱着轻视的态度去做的事情, 肯定会失败, 自视甚高的下场, 这一年已经体会过了.
今年, 卷土重来, 终于交上了一份漂亮的答卷.
未来还有很多要去面对的困难, 万里长征, 终于迈出了稳健的一步.
继续加油. |
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